Never Complain, by Baltasar Gracián
Aphorism 129 Never complain.
«The complaint always brings discredit. More serves as an example of daring to passion than of comfort to compassion. It opens the way to those who hear it for the same, and it is the news of the grievance of the first apology of the second. They give rise to some with their complaints of past offenses to those to come, and seeking remedy or consolation, they demand complacency, and even contempt. Better policy is to celebrate obligations of some to be efforts of others, and to repeat favors of the absent is to request those of the present, is to sell credit to each other. And the attentive male never publishes slights or defects, yes estimations, which serve to have friends and contain enemies. » (1)
In this aphorism , Gracián , warns us of the danger in which we fall frequently: complaining about a situation from which we have been damaged.
And he points out the consequences of such behavior:
- It will bring us discredit: because of the critical situation we have left as losers.
- It serves as a stimulus so that others knowing our weak points insist -now they- on the path of our pain. « we are prone, our enemies can point to them. And it can also serve as an excuse for others, because bad of many ...
- That plaintive behavior of ours does not reach its goal of obtaining comfort or understanding towards our position, but the contrary: satisfaction of the listener for our harm or disregard the same before our clumsiness, adding to past offenses , these new ones. (2)
But also Gracián shows us other better behaviors to replace the tendency to complain. And so, it tells us that:
Better policy is to manifest (communicate, expose, extend) what we have done and that has led others to congratulate us for it and to be grateful: « repeating favors of the absent is requesting those present », as someone who receives recognition and joys from others is undoubtedly someone from It's worth to surround yourself. He is also someone who serves as an example to others. That is why the attentive male (the Prudent Man), if he wants to have friends and contain potential enemies he should stop complaining - manifest to the public your complaint- and go on to always express estimable facts of which he has been favored or has successfully ended. (3)
Follow with health and meditate on the aphorism of Gracián , ... complaining hurts you.
Miguel Villarroya Martín, February 24, 2016/Madrid/Spain/FrS.009/ventasgrandes.net
Notes:
(1) The original text of the aphorism presented, Baltasar Gracián's 138: Arte de dejar estar , has been extracted from the First Edition of the Manual Oracle and Art of Prudence, by Baltasar Gracián, published in Huesca, Aragón, in 1647. See for example: http://www.cervantesvirtual .com/servlet/SirveObras/02584930900269417429079/index.htm
(2) Many centuries later H.N. Casson warned, with a certain sarcasm, that: How often you feel tempted to speak to someone about their misfortunes, do not do it! Half of those who tell him will not care about his mishap. And the other half will be glad that someone has finally given you your due.
(3 More serves as an example of daring to passion than of comfort to compassion is a dark phrase today.
